We were tired from a long day at the pool, errands, business meeting when M and I decided to make a late night grocery run.
Dale and I were visiting friends in Spokane, WA, reconnecting after years of no face-to-face time is no problem when you’re with old friends. Is that a pre-requisite for real friends? You can reconnect without any ceremony, even after years?
They were full of love, ready to give us the biggest and best of their lives whether it was fresh mixed drinks from their Mad Men cocktail leftovers (did you know Dirty Martinis are YUMMY?!) or the run of their boys’ playroom for Finn. The dad taught Finn how to shoot baskets, we hiked and found the best breakfast spots.
After a Soulation Board meeting (the reason for our visit) we were beat. The late night grocery store run made me feel spontaneous and un-mommified.
A nice feeling, even nicer to be sharing it with a friend I’ve always admired as being relevant, kind, sharp and deeply invested in loving Jesus better. We got to talk about our lives as M raced to the local enormous Target. She drives like she thinks: intensely.
I felt ten years younger, like we were two young girls in college.
She shared about her high school years, so different than mine. I found myself reflecting, again, how lucky I was to have friends who were honest with me, sharing their real selves. Mandy effortlessly drove us home and showed me how vulnerable women fuel change in this world.
Those last minute runs to the grocery store when I get to be with the women who are mothers, wives, daughters and, to me, friends, are gold.
An ode to friendship, late-night outings, coffee (or if you’re Sal and me tea) dates, hikes and long phone calls when you’re sure you’re cracking up:
Make new friends
But keep the old
One is silver
The other gold
Anne Lamott says that no problem is so dark or deep that a phone call can’t pull you out, as long as the voice on the other line is a friend.
Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor.
For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion.
But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up.
Who lifts you up?
How do you reach out to them?
How do you treasure your golden friendships?
Thanks for the reminder. This reminds me of some of the congregational leader’s comments during the Rosh Hashanah service Wednesday – about the need for being truly known by another human. He mentioned how sometimes he’ll offer his opinion to something in response to a question from his wife, and sometimes she’ll ask him “What does the REAL Ryan think,” and he has to snap out of his mental routine and really consider it. He loves to know that she truly knows him. I love that verse from Ecclesiastes, and how well God knows us and our nature and how best to make us strong.
Mandy,
Oh I love this, “What does the REAL (insert name here) think?” Takes a very courageous woman to say that and a very humble man to hear it.
I want to be both.
Yes! Reconnecting without ceremony. There is a special ease in that reconnection for old friends. I think a lot about how CS Lewis describes special friends bringing out characteristics when they get together. And I also think about how when friends intersect your life at monument times then those friends keep a special spot in your heart forever. And sometimes those friends wouldn’t be as close had you met them today. I am blessed with sweet people in my life.
Mandy,
Love that phrase “reconnecting without ceremony”. You know, one reason i think we can do that so easily is how deeply you’re soaked with Lewis. I often find we think the same because we have him as our intellectual mentor.