We’ve been watching a lot of Winnie-the-Pooh lately. Throughout this 2011 movie, Pooh must struggle to help his friends or feed his rumbling tummy. Piglet makes the decision easy.
Piglet offers to reach into a swarming hive to get Pooh some honey.
When Pooh suggests catapulting Piglet up into the hive, head first, Piglet says the most unbelievable line, “Well, I’m sure you’ve thought this through Pooh.”
He then steps bravely to the board and Pooh teeter-totters him splat into the hive.
Pooh doesn’t apologize, instead Piglet calls out from inside the hive, “I’m sorry I messed up the plan, Pooh.”
Pooh is busy trying to find a large branch to bat the hive off the tree, meanwhile Piglet says, “The bees are really quite friendly as long as I don’t make any sudden movements.”
Then, Wack! Pooh batters the hive to the ground as Piglet genuinely asks, “Are you sure that’s a good idea, Pooh?”
Pooh reassures Piglet it is.
Piglet and Pooh remind me of myself. I can be the self-assured bossy Pooh who uses his friends to get what he wants and the naive and easily persuaded Piglet who sacrifices his personal safety and intelligence to to give his friends what they want.
The over-apologizing is something I did just today at the store, apologizing to people for their inattentiveness, apologizing when someone had to help me figure out the dog food I needed (I mean, come on, Jonalyn, it was their job!).
Next thing you know I’ll be apologizing when someone trips me.
Do you know what causes this abundance of apologies?
The belief that I’m responsible for other people’s feelings or actions.
By apologizing to the person who put my head in the bee hive I’m forgetting the one person I do have responsibility over: myself.
What about you, have you ever apologized to someone for their mistake?
or gotten into a sticky situation to help someone else get something they could have reached by themselves?